Kamloops Wawa humour (part 2: the soupy newspaper)

Like most of the jokes in Kamloops Wawa, this one’s pretty mild & family-friendly.

5-hole-pamphlet-stitch1

The pamphlet stitch that was missing! (Image credit: jacobdegeling.com)

And it tells us something about the mechanics of printing that little newspaper.

kipuit

     Iht man tlap Chinuk pipa, pi wik
     ‘This one man received the Chinook paper, and’
iaka kipwit ukuk Chinuk pipa, pi ukuk
‘it wasn’t sewn up, that Chinook paper, and this’ 

man mamuk halak ukuk pipa, kakwa tkop man
‘man opened up that paper, like a White people’s’ 

iaka pipa, pi iaka nanich ukuk cim, iht
‘paper, and he saw that writing, some’ 

klatwa sahali, iht klatwa kikuli, pi
‘went upwards, some went downwards, and’ 

iaka tomtom iaka drit cipi ukuk pipa: iaka
‘he thought, This paper is really messed-up: its’ 

siisim kanawi mikst kakwa lasup…
‘stories are all mixed like soup…’ 

iht man chako, pi iaka wawa kopa iaka:
‘Another man came along, and this man said to him:’ 

= Nanich ukuk pipa ayu cipi wawa: drit
‘=Look, this paper is a bunch of messed-up words: it’s really’ 

kaltash ukuk pipa. Ukuk man wawa kopa
‘worthless, this paper. This other man said to’ 

iaka: = Wik iaka ukuk pipa iaka cipi,
‘him: =It’s not this paper that’s messed-up,’ 

maika, maika cipi, ilo tlus nanich kata
‘it’s you, you’re messed-up, not paying attention which way’ 

iaka oihat maika pipa. <X> Ilo tkop man
‘is the direction of your paper. It’s not a Whiteman’ 

kaltash nyus pipa ukuk, iaka kakwa buk ukuk
‘worthless newspaper, it’s like a book, this’ 

Chinuk pipa: mitlait iaka oihat. Iaka
‘Chinook paper: it has its own direction. Its’ 

nombir kopa kanawi pish. <1. 2. 3.
‘numbers are on every page. 1, 2, 3,’ 

4. 5. 6. 7…> Pus maika tlus
‘4, 5, 6, 7…If you pay’ 

nanich kanawi ukuk pish klaska nombir
‘attention to all of those pages’ numbers’ 

maika drit tlap tlus siisim kopa ukuk pipa.
‘you’ll really get good news from this paper.’ 

— from Kamloops Wawa #203 (December, 1902), page 185, column 2

Kata maika tomtom? What do you think?